It wasn’t long before I got really jaded.
Tour can make you extremely homesick and miss all the little things. Yes, the obvious stuff like your bed, family, and friends… But it’s also the things you take for granted which are now out of reach.
I got used to showering in public places, like the venue’s locker rooms– usually with ice cold water, since you were the millionth person in line. One time at a truck stop, a hooker and some nasty dude stepped out of the shower right before my turn… yeah, I skipped out on that one.
Laundry wasn’t an option, so I had to keep buying socks and underwear to stay sane. Buying stuff was a luxury in itself– I was either stuck at the venue or on the bus, so the few chances to get things from the real world were precious. Wal-Mart’s a shiny sign of civilization when you’re driving in the middle of fucking nowhere.
Besides the day-to-day grind, I just wasn’t happy with being on tour. The idea of DJing on a national festival, traveling the country, and promoting a female-positive label had seemed like a golden opportunity– a great way to break out as an artist while exposing a different crowd to electronic music…
Instead, I was more like a sideshow. I played all day (often missing lunch) before and after bands’ sets. On the Warped Tour, people wanna see guitars destroyed and singers bleeding from thrashing microphones– not some DJ with a pair of headphones.
Oh, and those turntables that I’d requested? What about those CDJ’s?
They were nowhere to be found. I was given a pair of Radio Shack CD decks and a semi-functioning mixer that looked like it was from a garage sale. A dual cassette deck might’ve had better pitch control…
The internet on our bus never worked, so I couldn’t download new music, and I never had time to anyway since I was setting up or breaking down the tent.
All of this burned me out REALLY quick.
Maybe it was boredom, or the physical/mental stress of touring, or the fact I was running away from all the pain and sadness in my life… most likely, it was all of the above.
Whatever it was, it made me self-destruct.
One night, after getting wasted on cheap beers in the parking lot, I found myself breaking the one rule that Jenna had enforced from the very first day…
I made out with her bass player. On the bus.
And right at that moment, she walked in the door.
“No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.” - Ansel Adams
Flying from Germany to New York with tons of unanswered questions was beyond nerve-wracking.
How would I get along with 9 other strangers? What was living on a bus like? How would the punk and emo crowds respond to electronic music?
I also felt an incredible amount of pressure from the outside…
My dad was confused and disappointed. I was living like a vagabond instead of doing something responsible with my college degree. Why couldn’t I just grow up and let go of these impractical, foolish dreams?
My mom was concerned that I wasn’t staying grounded, and my older brother was worried that I wouldn’t endure the tour physically and mentally. In fact, I was so hurt by his doubt in me that I cut him off for months.
Still, I moved forward with my decision. I took a train from Penn Station to Baltimore and met the rest of my tour mates there.
These included: Jenna (the label owner); her 3 bandmates; a couple of merch girls (one of them being Sharon, a tour manager of sorts); and Chet, the sound guy.
Unlike mainstage artists who can party, wake up hung over, and show up in time for their set, we were working at least 14 hours a day.
Here’s a typical day in the life…
7am: Wake up to the sound of Sharon yelling at everyone to get out of bed. Crawl from your coffin-like bunk. If you’re lucky enough to get the top bunk like me, you’ll usually hit your head on the ceiling since it’s only a foot away from your pillow. Open up the trailer at the back of the bus.
Lift heavy boxes of merchandise onto dollies. Push dollies across long distances– up and down hills, through grass, dirt, rocks, and mud… Unload at the venue. Build two tents: one for the music, the other for merch. The music tent gets set up with a stage, speakers, and DJ booth, while the merch tent calls for gridwall and pretty displays of T-shirts, buttons, stickers, and CDs…
You were lucky if you had time between setup and the start of the festival to get breakfast. Most days we were working right down to the wire, finishing up just as the gates opened.
Then, at the end of the day, we had to count out merch, tear down our tents, fill up the boxes, strap them onto dollies, and pack up the trailer. After busting ass all day in the sweltering heat, breathing in dust, and using disgusting Port-O-Potties, this was an extremely grueling process.
By the time the trailer was loaded up, you’d sometimes have a few hours to chill. Otherwise, you were back on the bus for a long-ass drive to the next city. Have fun trying to get a good night’s sleep…your only privacy comes from a fabric curtain for your bunk, and you’ll feel every bump and turn in the road from your bed.
Repeat the entire process day after day, sometimes going almost a full 2 weeks without a break.
The first couple days made me realize that this was no glamourous experience…
It was boot camp.
So, let’s pick up from where we left off.
First, a mini recap for those who are just jumping on board…
In Chapter 15, I told the story of how I’d hit rock bottom (one of many along the way). My dog of 14 years had passed away from cancer, but I’d been too busy partying to emotionally prepare for it. Now, all the “friends” I was busy partying with had scattered, and I realized all the club scene bullshit I’d based my life around was shallow, self-indulgent, and temporary.
It was time for a fresh start and to finally become the electronic musician I’d dreamed of being. Living in Europe and making beats were two of my biggest dreams. In Chapter 16, I wrote about how I just went for it. I packed my bags and flew to Germany, where some of my relatives live. I was staying with them for a few weeks, planning to end up in Berlin. That’s when I got the email inviting me to DJ on the Warped Tour.
After being torn on which path to take, I decided to close my eyes and jump. Sure, Berlin would’ve been epic and life-changing, but when would I have the chance to tour the country again?
What an insane whirlwind 2009 was!
We kicked off dejaded last February and took you guys along on the beginning of Nerd Revolt’s journey. Our first shows, the EP from start to finish (and the five million steps in between), Vietnam, and our exodus to San Francisco. The future’s wide open… even WE don’t know where it’ll take us!
Now that I’m getting back to a normal sleep pattern and my life isn’t running at such a frantic pace, I’m excited to get deeper into writing. Of course, we’ll keep throwing you guys all the visual goodies, but I’ve been antsy to dig back into our past again– the stories that brought us to where we are.
Now entering…
The Haze of Introspection: Part 2.
We gave you a little behind-the-scenes action with “From Studio to Stage”, so now it’s time to share the beats that came out of that gig.
After rehearsing through a ridiculous heat wave, we packed up the car, drove 250 miles from Seattle, and set up for a 3:30 am set. We were deliriously tired, but playing in the mountains under a full moon was simply surreal. Trout Lake is supposedly one of the world’s UFO hotspots…sounds like the perfect setting for two cyborgs from Planet Bambooshay.
There’s some distortion on the recording (i.e. vocal feedback, bass crunchiness), but it should give you a good idea of the journey we went on…
Happy new year from the NR crew! 
Nerd Revolt: Live @ Photosynthesis 2.0 Festival, August 2009 by Nerd Revolt
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